The Day After

Yesterday we shared our vows. There's something about making pledges in front of other people that makes it a really big deal. These were my vows.

I choose you. I chose you when I barely knew you because something in your soul spoke to mine. We were both brave and followed that tugging we both felt but could not explain. We followed our hearts to the woods of North Carolina, to your river and woods. We followed our hearts to the temples of Chiang Mai and the Andaman Sea where we first pledged ourselves to one another as wives. We did all of this having known each other less than three months.

Now that I know you better and have dove deeper into your waters, I choose you again.

I see you as a whole person. A beautiful, flawed, lovely, person who contains multitudes.

I choose you when times are good and I choose you when times are tough. My commitment to you and to us as a couple has not wavered even when we have faced challenges.

I choose to first see your beauty, your intelligence, your compassion, your kindness and love. I also recognize your humanity and see how you are working always on being a better person for yourself and a better partner to me.

I promise to also always work to be a better person, for myself and for us. I will cultivate my patience, compassion, and kindness.

I will work on being my most authentic self and will share myself with you, letting you in deeper than anyone else.

You are a blessing in my life and I will strive to never take you for granted. I promise to put our relationship with each other above any other relationship.

I will love you as long as I breathe. My intent and sincerest hope is that this marriage will last through this life and into whatever comes next.

If I find my romantic love for you fading I will work to rekindle it.

I promise that if there comes a time where I no longer believe we are right for each other, I will tell you right away and not string you along. I promise that if you make that decision I will release you from our marriage as an act of love and respect. 

I will honor you as an individual, separate from me and will give you space when you need it and take space as I need it.

I will trust you and come to you with my fears, insecurities, and anxieties even when it is scary for me. I thank you for your patience while I work on this part. I promise to communicate my needs and not expect you to just know.

I promise to put our love above my pride.

I promise to assume best intent on your behalf.

I will be your biggest cheerleader. I promise to support you in your pursuit of your dreams, encouraging you when you need it.

I will always tell you that I love you, not just with my voice, but with my actions, and with my body.

I offer you my hand, to walk side by side through the rest of our days together as companions, lovers, best friends, wives, and soul mates.