Real


There is nothing timid about the way that I love. When I am truly in love it is fathomless. It is me ripping my chest open and exposing my beating heart to you.  It is me setting aside my pride and being authentic, open...raw. It is me unlocking all of your doors with all of the keys I keep finding; poking around inside and looking for the doors you’ve not opened in a long time, if ever.

It is me accepting you as a person distinct from me with your own ways of thinking and doing. It is me wanting to understand you, me wanting to see all of you. It is me honoring and respecting our differences but also me gently encouraging you to be your best, most authentic self. It is me tenderly loving you, all of you. It is me loving your beauty, your shame, your weaknesses, your failings, your triumphs, your hopes, your entire person. It is me celebrating you and holding up a mirror so that you can see your glory.

When it is real, our love can transport us to another place, a place beyond this plane of existence, a world which we create through our love, a world in which only we two can inhabit, never the same with anyone else.

It is finding all of the ways to delight each other. It is pushing our boundaries little by little as our trust grows.  It is exploring our edges and taking risks. It is powerful and all encompassing.  
Transitioning from this kind of love to friendship is not easy, it takes time and distance. It is a constant dull ache and at times it is a pain so searing it is hard to breathe. It is also fond memories that bring a smile to my face. More than anything, it is gratitude that it happened.

I’ve never before grieved the end of one love while creating new love with someone else. I’ve always had significant time between. Navigating the myriad feelings and mood changes every day is no small feat.  I retreat into my quiet frequently.  But I wouldn’t change a thing.  I wouldn’t give up the love that I left and the time we had and I wouldn’t postpone the new love I have found. 

I do, though, look forward to the day when this is all a bit easier. That day is coming; I can see it on the horizon.  



Comments

  1. KyleDecember 17, 2014 at 5:48 PM

    Thank you, dear one. I wouldn't give up a moment of it either and I certainly don't regret the love we shared. I am also looking forward to our friendship on the horizon and wish you well in your new love. Time and distance, and in the future, a deep loving friendship. Happy new beginnings...

    ReplyDelete
  2. Red RiderDecember 17, 2014 at 11:19 PM

    So beautiful. I love you so much, my dear friend. As ever, you are an inspiration.

    ReplyDelete

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